It wasn't a burning bush ... it was a stupid refrigerator

I have been blogging this month about my friends, and I am excited to announce that over the next few weeks you are going to get to meet some of them.  Five wonderful, witty, and faithful friends will be guest blogging here on The Celebrated Family.  I can't wait for you to meet them all.  First up Lindsey Wingo from Missional Motherhood.  

In our previous rental house, we were able to put an extra refrigerator in the garage for food overflow...only, it didn’t work out quite like we hoped.

Somehow, that old refrigerator tripped the downstairs breaker from time to time turning itself completely off when we least expected it. The first time I discovered this unfortunate situation, I found a giant bag of frozen mixed berries in the freezer completely melted. So much for those smoothies! Just when we thought it was safe to store some food in it again, it tripped the breaker and totally shut down. Bottom line is, it was unreliable, it was using up more energy than it was worth, and it became a nuisance rather than a help. 

One morning, after a busy weekend, I woke up early for the first time in several days to take in God's Word and sit in His presence. The night before I found myself frustrated, anxious, stressed, and feeling guilty because I knew I had been short-tempered and easily agitated that day. I was letting my focus shift from what I knew to be true, that God would provide for all of my family’s needs and is in total control of our lives, to worrying and showing a complete lack of trust in the God who, even though He doesn't have to, has proven Himself faithful time and time again.

That morning, as I remembered I left some groceries in the downstairs refrigerator, I thought to myself, "If that stupid refrigerator turned off again in the middle of the night I will be so mad!" I made my coffee and sat down to read my Bible. I was reading in Jeremiah and something interesting stood out to me. God used very practical, everyday situations to speak to Jeremiah, make certain points, and then pass on those words to the Israelites. As my mind wandered toward that thought, I remembered how Jesus often spoke in parables during his ministry on earth and constantly gave practical life lessons in ways the people would understand. Then I remembered the refrigerator…

What was its problem? It was not broken, it was just unreliable hooked up to its current power source. We put food in, it stayed on long enough for us to reconsider trusting its performance, then before we knew it, we had melted berries. I am far too often like that refrigerator. I'm unreliable. I take in spiritual food, sometimes very consistently, and then before you know it, it's been days (or even longer) that I've failed to feast on God's word or spend time with the one who sustains me, making it quite evident in the rotten things that come out. Can I be trusted with a word from the Lord? Can I be depended on to cultivate and preserve the Word of God in my heart, or will it become a rotten stench in His nostrils in the way I go on ignoring His truth. Just as the refrigerator preserves physical food in order to feed our growing family, is the spiritual food deposited into my soul being then poured out in order to feed those around me, or am I holding it in, letting it waste away inside me?

This gentle reminder from the Lord spurs me on in my faith, reminds me of the utmost importance to stay "plugged in" to my true source of power, and not allow His word to sit and sour in my heart. May I become more like Him so that I can be depended on to preserve the Word He's given and faithfully share it with others in my sphere of influence. May my husband and children not get the rotten stench of my flesh, but the pleasing aroma of Christ in me.

***

Lindsey Wingo is the wife of Worship Pastor, Ryan Wingo and together they have two daughters, Ivey (3), and Ruthie (1). She is currently a stay-at-home mom and spends her days among piles of toys, sippy cups, laundry, and groceries. Lindsey has a passion for women's ministry and loves nothing more than conversing with a fellow sister in Christ over a hot cup of coffee…and chocolate of course! With a newly rediscovered love for writing, as well as a desire to encourage other mom’s, Lindsey recently launched a collaborative blog for mothers at missionalmotherhood.com.  Lindsey also enjoys writing letters to her daughters on her personal blog, which can be found at lindseywingo.blogspot.com. 

What do your friends say about your faith?

Last week I started a series about what our friends say about us.  Based on the saying, "You are the company you keep,"  who our friends are, and what they talk about with us,  can tell us a lot about ourselves.
 

So what do your friends say about your faith?  I don't mean this literally.  If we claim to be a Christian, our friends probably would say some canned cute answer about our faith.  Instead, what do your conversations with your friends say about your faith?

Do they say you are growing in your faith?

Last week my friend Kimball called me out of the blue.  I was so happy to get her call. We are crazy in so many similar ways - and crazy loves crazy!  We immediately dove off into a wacky conversation, within 7 minutes we had covered 6 topics and Kimball was sharing with me an area in her life that the Lord is working.  After I hung up the phone, that aspect of the conversation lingered with me.  I am so grateful for friends like Kimball who know I am striving to grow in my faith, so they feel comfortable sharing with me where they are growing.  We are kindred spirits on the same journey and I am blessed they recognize that.

Are your friends sharing their faith walk with you?  If not, why?  Do they know that you are striving to grow in your faith, and would be interested in hearing what the Lord is doing in their life?  If not, start the conversation yourself, and let your friends know you're on this journey with them.

Do they say you are a Titus women? 

(Church-girl definition:  "A Titus Women" is a reference to the book of Titus which encourages older women to mentor younger women.  And stay out of too much wine.)

In 5 months I'll be 40.  I think I'm 20, but I'm not.  Even if I was 20, there'd be a 16 year old around who needed a Titus woman in her life.  God calls us to turn around and help our younger sisters in their marriages, parenting, and faith walks.  Last Friday I had such a great day. From 10:00 - 2:00 I went from coffee to lunch with two sweet younger sister-friends.  I adore these two women, and I'm privileged to talk with them our faith and marriages.  I am honored by their friendships and the trust they have in me to ask me for advice, and listen to what I have to say.  (I was such a train-wreck at their ages, that I just stand in awe of both of these women!  I love you ladies!)

If you are 30+ do you have a friend that is at least 10 years younger than you?  If not, you need to go find one!  Ask a younger women at work or church out for lunch.  I bet she'd love to have you in her life.

Do they say you are a safe person to talk about faith with?

Perhaps the loudest thing our friends say about our faith, is what they don't say.  Can your friends safely talk to you about your faith even if they don't agree with you?  Do you have any non-believing friends that will talk to you about God?  If not, that silence should be deafening.

My friend Lisa and I have different views on our Creator, but we both respect and love one another.   A few months ago I got a text from her that said her son was interested in reading the Bible and she'd told him Ms. Wendy might have a suggestion.  Heck yeah I have a suggestion!  Thanks to Amazon Prime Ethan had a youth boy's devotion bible two days later.   I was so honored that Lisa knew she could safely have that conversation with me - and any conversations that come in the future.  Lisa is an awesome mom.  She is intentional in the way she invests in her kids.  The fact that she could trust me tells me she knows my faith is one of love, and not judgement.  It tells me she knows my faith is authentic to my life and who I am.  She is too good of a mom, to trust her kid's questions to anyone, so I am so glad she trusted me.

Are non-believers talking to you about your faith?  I hope so.  If you hope to have any impact in your world, you have to start by being a safe person.

I'd love to hear about your friends, and what they say to you about their faith - and perhaps your own.

What are your friends saying about your marriage?

I love the saying "We are the company we keep."  Like my grandmother's sayings, it's true.  There was a season in my life that if you'd listened in on my conversations with friends you'd have heard three conversation repeated over.. and over.

1.  I am exhausted.  I have to do _________.
2. Pete doesn't understand how hard it is to be a stay-at-home mom.
3. My kids are driving me crazy.

The majority of my conversations focused on complaints, and the majority of my friends were very happy to follow suit.  I was the company I kept, because I chose to keep company with women who shared in my pity party.  They confirmed and fueled my negative tendency, and I liked it.  

I know that if the Lord had not redirected my path, I would still be in that place because my sinful nature is negative, it loves to find something to complain about.  Ugh ... the flesh.

Does any of that ring true to you?  Today I'm starting a series about what our friends are saying about us.  In this series we'll look at what our friends are saying about our marriages, our faith, and our priorities. Why what our friends are saying?  Because we are the company we keep.....

Today let's talk about what our friends are saying about our marriage.

Over the last few years the Lord has taken my hand and whispered in my ear:

    "Forget about what's happened; Don't keep going over old history.  Be alert, be present.  I'm about to do something brand new. "  

Isaiah 43:  18-19 (The Message) 

God started to tune my ear to my conversations about my marriage.  I started to hear, to really hear, the negativity of my own words against Pete.  I also started to hear the words and hearts of some new women, women who were saying very different things than my core friends were saying about their marriages.   These woman started an important shift in me about the way I think and talk about my husband.  I'd like to introduce you to three of those women:  

Jinny Mudd is the funniest woman I know.  Spend a little time with her and your mascara will be running down your face and you'll be trying not to pee your pants - she's just that funny.  But woven in her humor is the heart of a women bent on the mission of giving her husband an incredible life. This summer five of us friends spent the weekend together. One night she shared that she hopes to engrave on her husband's tombstone:

                                                          His Cup Run'th Over

While she had us laughing when she shared her mission, it didn't take long for the conversation to turn serious.  Why?  Because frankly that thought had never occurred to the rest of us.  What would my marriage look like if I had the mission of giving Pete an incredible life? 

This summer our Uncle Johnny passed away.  During the days after, his wife, Aunt Betty, shared with me that she had no regrets.  No regrets.  What an incredible thing to be able to say after a life shared together.  Don't you want to be able to say that?  

                                                      I have no regrets. 
                                                  His Cup Run'th Over.  

At the end of my marriage, I know I won't regret the complaining I didn't do.  If I want to have no regrets, I have to focus on the good, live in gratitude, and work on me.  Wouldn't it be helpful to have some kindred spirits to do that with?  

One of the first people I met when I moved to Raleigh was Tara Furman.  Meeting Tara for coffee was my indoctrination to the south.  Tara is sweet tea, and Chick-fil-A, and Jesus all wrapped up into one.  Meeting Tara let this Western girl know she was going to be okay in the South. (Bless her heart)

You can have one cup of coffee with Tara and she'll unabashedly tell you where her marriage has been, and where the Lord has brought it. On the second cup of coffee you'll find yourself spilling your guts about your own role in your marriage and what you can work on.  During the third cup of coffee (if it takes that long), Tara will invite you into a gathering of women who are changing up their conversation of marriage.  She'll invite you to join her and 75+ women who gather monthly at Knowing God Ministry luncheons.  You see Tara doesn't just have a vision for her marriage, she has a vision for OUR marriages.  A vision that starts with our lives transformed by Jesus. 

             Through the redeeming power of Jesus, we can live out marriages with abundant love...                                                          so that we'll have no regrets...
                                                 and we can say "His Cup Run'th Over" 

What a shift!  The beautiful thing is - when that happens I believe it will be said of us:
                                                                Her Cup Run'th Over

That's something that never would have been said by remaining in my place of complaints, negativity and whining.  Because of these women, and others, what I say about my marriage is very different these days.  Because of what I say, my marriage is very different these days.  

What do your friends say about your marriage?   Do your conversations focus on how your husband forgot to take the trash out this morning, or that last night he gave the kids their baths?  Do your conversations focus on what he's doing, or on what you know you need to be doing?  

I'd love to hear what your friends are saying about (and into) your marriage... please share with us one of your friends and how she is helping you in your marriage.  

Live in the Raleigh area?  Join Tara for the next Knowing God Ministries Luncheon .